Comer Fair, 2014

This year’s Comer Fair was a little different this… you know, out of the three years total we’ve gone. We thought we might just go as a family and had picked the best day for us to go (Tuesday-the cheapest). But when I got home, I got a bad report in regards to my children’s behavior. Elijah was kicking the large purple ball around and knocked off a ceramic plate off the mantel. It of course broke in several pieces, to which his mother informed him he would have to pay for it. He got angry, and it escalated as it often did, even to the point of him kicking at his mother and calling her names like “stupid.” Aubrey had a little back talking of her own that day, but nothing quite so severe. I got home, and then had to make a tough decision. I even phoned my parents for some additional opinions. Do we still go to the fair? Do we just let Aubrey go? Do we just call off the whole thing?

Well, in the end I realized that Aubrey deserved a spank, but her privilege to go would never even be at risk if it had not been for Elijah’s behavior. So I was just going to take her, and let Elijah stay at home and learn a tough lesson. But when I informed him that Aubrey was going to go, and he was going to miss the Fair completely this year, he became irate, and so I just decided to send the girls out, and the boys would turn in early, despite all the screaming and yelling.

Aubrey had a wonderful evening with her mom. They stayed out pretty late, until around 9:30 (it closed at 10) when Aubrey informed her mother, “I’m ti-uhd, Mama.” When they got home, Aubrey came in with a giant smile and a half-eaten bag of cotton candy. Stephanie then told me a few cute things about the evening. She really enjoyed the Ferris Wheel and the long slide. She also seemed to really enjoy the bigger rides (the ones where she was just tall enough to go on). Last year when Elijah rode those rides, he stuck his tongue out and distorted his face like he was going to throw up. This year, the younger Aubrey held a big smile the whole night. On one particular one of these rides (where they also play all the inappropriate music), Aubrey noticed a teenage girl in front of her pointing her finger and pumping her arm in the air to the music. Perhaps believing this was an expected activity while riding, she did the same. Too cute.

And back on the home front, I spent the next hour enduring some angry words and disrespectful behavior… for a while, hoping to let Elijah vent some of his anger. In the end, I made sure he had a very unpleasant evening. We received confirmation the next week that the tough decision indeed made an impression. Elijah’s class at school read Alexander and the Terrible, Horrible, No-Good, Very Bad Day, and then answered the question, “What was your terrible, horrible, no-good, very bad day?” I’ll give you one guess what his answer was.

But one more important aspect of the evening. Elijah and I had a good talk about the importance of respect and obedience, and the reason these consequences are a loving thing. Because the real problem isn’t the “stupid” comment, the kick, or even the broken plate, the real problem is the condition of his heart. He was willing to calm down a little and be respectful until he found out he wasn’t going to get what he wanted, and then he had a decision to make. Do I trust that my father is good (with all the many good things around me to assure me of this truth), and that he knows what’s best for me, or am I going to decide he’s a bad father who is withholding good things from me that will bring me joy? The same decision we constantly face in regards to our Heavenly Father. Because as much as I’m now an adult and father, I’m still His child.